[If she acted, then what happened wouldn’t be her responsibility, but of that who decided long ago even though it seemed she had an opportunity to change their life. This time it was her mother’s life.]
They walked until they reached the same ward she had been before.
“You must enter first.” the child said.
“Why?” Ity asked.
“You gave us the idea.”
“Did I? How curious I don’t remember.” she said as she began to walk inside the place expecting to find the guard that would stop her. He didn’t show up. Enough light was entering through the skylight to make her blind. She couldn’t understand what was happening again. She had no control. Why did that happen to her, again?
14
“My mother always said that choices are the real way of expressing your dissatisfaction with your actual world. She told me that I did not need to be cranky about anything, but to take responsibility of my life.” Ity thought as she entered anther reality.
She understood that people don’t forgive mistakes of others because they cannot forgive theirs. We are afraid of confronting ourselves, so we criticize what is not what we think we are.
16
In those instants, they were one spirit that couldn’t understand their individual identity. Was Ity her mother or was her mother Ity? Were the decisions of her mother different from the control Ity could have to change her mother’s life?
Ity’s mother had never been only herself, but also Ity through spiritual time travel. She hadn’t known that in the past, but until now in their present “together”.
18
How could she judge her mother for having the life she chose? If they could both alter the life that none of them did change? It was perfect. At last she saw the reason for living each moment as they did… Love.
Her mother had chosen with love the way her life should be, there was no possible way to change it. When there is love, actions are perfect. There is no reason to condemn because it is all done by our own responsibility.
20
To take real responsibility is to become what you are by doing to others what you would do to you. Why was she so fortunate to understand the key to happiness, and eternity through such strange events that could take her as a crazy person?
21
When the light vanished, she was wearing again the wedding dress. She looked around. It seemed she was on the same garden. She saw the man that she was supposed to marry, and then searched the man that had said to her that love was liberty. There he was. She ran to him, and said,” What is your name?”
“Frederic… Are you still confused?” He asked.
“You… You… Are…” Ity was in shock. He was…
22
“I cannot marry Henry.” She shouted so hard that the people beside her began to mumble. In a matter of seconds, Henry ran to her.
“What happened here? Did you do her something? Leave!” He ordered Frederic.
“Henry! I just don’t feel well.” Ity exclaimed as he left and continued arguing with Henry.
“Is that an excuse to call the wedding off?”
“Why are you accusing me of that?”
“You have always been in love of Frederic. Haven’t you?”
“No! He is my mother’s husband.” Ity said
23
“Why are you telling such nonsense? Your mother died long time ago, and your father is standing there, alive.” Henry said pointing to an old white haired man.
“I’m so sorry. I can’t marry you…” Ity said, and fainted again. It had been the second time she fainted, and this time Henry was really angry. They picked her up, and took her to a room.
24
Ity woke up in the ward. The dresses were dancing without people inside them. They were singing a song.
25
When the song ended the dresses magically began speaking together,” It is time for you to go. When you come back you won’t remember what happened here.”
“They told me that I couldn’t leave this place if I entered it. Why will I come back?” Ity asked.
“You understood the magic of our work. You didn’t judge us for being different from you, and choosing different lives to find the love that inhabits us.” they said as their voice echoed throughout the entire place, “The door is open. Open your eyes to your new present.”
26
“When will I come back?” Ity asked
“That is not our choice.” they all said.
“Good-bye,” Ity said as she began to walk toward the entrance, asking herself why had she decided to risk herself in a way she could lose what she thought she was. She was still there, and her identity was intact. She crossed the door.
Death.
As I painted
my old ghosts,
I fell into death.
{… }
Death?
This place isn’t lumber.
{… }
I can’t remember
who I am,
where I was,
what I did,
but the love I gave,
the love I am.
{… }
Why do we forget
who we are?
{… }
If I am born again,
I would be more of us,
more true, more love.
{… }
Why do we forget
who we are
if we can be love
at every instant?
She was not here, nor there. Time and space ended to her. She was being nurtured by infinite love.
She had forgotten what she had lived inside her mother’s body, but feeling the essence of what she had lived. It was like reading a book, and not remembering the exact phrases, but understanding completely what she had learned. She wanted to understand and create again for and with love.
I believe having faith on ourselves
is an open door to miracles.
I forgot I could die,
and see me here,
begging for more time,
without realizing time
is mere relativity.
Birth.
She couldn’t see what was happening. Everything was blurred, but felt a heartbeat near her. It gave her love. She had to teach them. She had to learn from them. She was humanly in love, again. Let’s rejoice. We are alive.